Harsh Realities
by evening blue
Summary: Innocence should never be taken by force (this maybe offensive for some people)
1. Chapter 1

Innocence is something that shouldn't be taken with force... Persephone P.O.V

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A/N: Hi, this is my first fanfiction that I've actually posted and I hope you enjoy the story. Just a warning this is an extremely dark tale of how Hades kidnapped Persephone and is not appropriate for people underage. I love this couple, but it sometimes it disturbs me when people write of rape as if it isn't a big deal, that it's something that people just get over. with that in mind i hope you enjoy the style of writing and give me constructive criticism.

once again this is a story of rape and may offend some people...

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Harsh Realities

I let my hands glide over the long golden grass of the Eleusinian Fields, a smile grows upon my face as I hum a familiar tune my mother once sang for me. Closing my eyes I lift my face towards the rays of the sun, I still see the brightness beneath my eyelids. I enjoy the moist ground beneath my bare feet as I dance an unknown dance to myself, occasionally signing words with the music in my head. I imagine the blossom of flowers and examine my work as I sway to the music, still humming and still smiling while I feel the sun on my back. Today is so beautiful, another glorious day of summer, the sun high above the earth with no cloud to threaten it's divine warmth. I drop myself gently to the ground, listening to the sounds of nature that stir around me, to be a goddess of the earth is truly a blessing, I think to myself as I look around the fields. Suddenly my breath gets caught in my throat as I see a flower I've never seen before. Tilting my head I walk towards it until I notice it's out of my mother's sacred fields. I stare at it hesitantly, wanting to go over and study the new flower, but not wanting to get my mother angry. I look around to see if any one is near, and with no one around I'm still hesitant about inspecting the flower. I don't understand how I could not know of this flower, but the flower seems to draw me towards it and my curiosity gets the best of me. I walk away from the safety of my mother's gardens cautiously and bend over to look at the strange flower. It's petals of snow white delicately curve towards the stem while the inner most petals are a vibrant orange, I gently touch it and decide to show my mother.

Pulling out the flower by the roots I go to carry my findings to my mother, until feel the ground shake. Looking behind me I see the hole where the plant once was begin to grow and crumble, a loud roar comes from the ever growing hole as I decide to run to mother. But never had I seen the earth open like this, all from a tiny flower. I hear the sounds of hooves and come to face with four black horses that eyes glow blood red. I forget to breath as I take in the large golden chariot with engraved designs as well as the tall armored man holding the reins. I feel terror fill my veins as I make eye contact with the stranger in the helmet, and make a run for it. As I turn away a hand grabs my wrist and drags me onto the chariot, holding me close to a firm body. I scream as the master of the horses whips his reins and the horses drag us beneath the earth. Darkness engulfs us as I start to cry still trying to struggle out of this mans grip on me. But soon light follows the darkness though this light does not belong to the sun. Momentarily I am frozen at what I see, a glowing green river flows beneath the chariot as the horses continue running. I don't understand how water can glow until I realize that water does not flow through the river but souls. I grow paler as the realization of seeing deceased souls and know where I am, and who this may be. Hades, God of the Underworld.

Finding my strength I continue my fight as I try to pry his hands off of my waist, I try to scratch, bite, punch and kick at the armored god, the stories of this man screaming at me. He is known for his cruel and merciless ways on Olympus and on earth, a reputation that I have always believed and can now confirm. The four galloping stallions come to a stop as their master grabs my waist and throws me onto his shoulder, holding tight onto the back of my legs. The doors are thrown open as we walk through his kingdom, feeling his power when he commands them to open on their own. I try to roll off of his shoulder as I continue hitting him and screaming, commanding him to let me go. I am almost dropped but I hear his growl and feel him aggressively readjust me on his shoulder. My tears still fall from my eyes as I struggle and the feeling of helplessness settles in my heart. It's not until the last door we enter that true fear hits me though. I notice the room he has lead me in, and feel the soft cushioning of a bed breaking my fall. My eyes widen as I try to scramble off it, almost falling in my hast to leave this man. He takes off his helmet and for the first time I can truly confirm that this is a man and not a beast, but I don't dare take in any other features of him as I race towards the still open doors. The double doors slam shut before I have the chance to escape and I start screaming and banging my fists onto the doors for help. I feel him grab my waist and throw me onto the bed again, as if I am just a play thing and see his deep dark eyes. I shudder, trying to crawl away from his figure as he begins to walk towards the bed. I don't recognize the look in his eyes, but I recognize the stories my mother once told me. She had warned me against the advances of men, especially this kind, taken by force. Now for the first time in my life I beg, plead with my life for him to stop, for him to take pity and not rob me of my purity, my virtue.

I am so scarred that my body freezes as he gently places his palm on my face, his eyes trying to look into mine, as though he is trying to calm me. I am still begging for mercy looking into his eyes, praying to my father that he will save me. But I pull my face away from his lips avoiding, denying him a kiss, so he grabs me by the back of my knees and pulls them forward. I land on my back and stare up at him, into his dark eyes as he looks down at my body and I see all hesitation leave his mind. He grabs the front of my white gown and tears at it, revealing my pale body beneath his. I start to struggle again, knowing reason won't be found with him. I fight with everything I have in me, I scream my curses at him and scream for help but my cries for mercy from any one are left unheard, he roughly grabs my failing arms as they continuously beat down onto his bare chest, he holds them above my head and I feel my tears roam down my face. I keep thrashing beneath him and notice him adjusting the front of his pants. I go to knee him where he pulls out his erection, but to no avail, I hear him growl at my attempt and he harshly opens my legs and places himself before my entrance. I close my eyes and look to the side, feeling his breath against my neck but as I feel him intrude I can't help but let out a scream of pain. My eyes shoot open as I feel him inside of me, feel him thrusting in and out of me. I continue to cry and pray that this is a horrible nightmare that my mother will wake me from. But I know it's not, the pain is too real to deny, to imagine, and as I go limp underneath him, my new pray is that he finishes soon, that he gets his need, lust, his crime over with so I wont feel the pain any more. I feel my self die, the purity ripped away when he fills me with his seed and collapses on top of me.

So this is how purity feels when its gone, the pain between my legs is the proof that I'm not an innocent maiden any more, that I am unclean. I refuse to look at him and hold in my tears, though he saw me cry already. My jaw is clenched and my chin is upright, facing towards one of his walls. I feel him pull out of me, I feel the cold seep in when his body leaves mine. I tightly close my eyes as I hear him dress and leave the room, and pull my self to my knees. Feel the liquid between my legs and see blood on his white silk sheets, I know that this is from his attack and not my moon cycle as it has his seeds mixed in with it. I move away from it quickly because it confirms reality and my breathing becomes labored, I feel as if I am drowning and there is no chance to get to the surface. I feel a pressure against my throat and taste bile in my mouth, I try to control my stomach but naturally I bend to my body's will and lean forward to throw up, emptying the breakfast I had with my mother only this morning. I still feel tears run down my face as I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. I get up to leave his bed but my legs give way as I feel a stabbing, raw pain deep within my abdomen. I lie down onto his cold marbled floor and let out an agonizing scream so the world, heaven and hell can know my pain. Tiredness seems to envelop me suddenly my eyes stinging from their tears, as I try to blink away sleep. But my last thoughts are of my mother, and how she will not accept me once she finds out her baby daughter is now not a virgin, is not pure or clean any more.

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A/N: further note i don't know whether to leave this as a one shot or not, either way let me know. I you want more chapters i'll do what i can but will probably have to rename it and all any way thanks for reading :)

P.S sorry if this has offended anyone


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I've decided to continue the story (obviously), but thank you all for your kind reviews, I have to admit i was expecting hate mail for writing such a graphic portray of their first meeting. Any way this is the next chapter and i hope it reaches your expectations. I know it's short so tomorrow or the day after i will post the third one, so enjoy :)

P.S constructive criticism is always welcomed :)

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Chapter 2:

As I wake with groggy eyes all I see is darkness. I blink to clear the darkness but it doesn't seem to yield to the light that should always be here. I pull my self up and realize that this isn't my bed nor my night gown I wear now. I see flashes of the day before my eyes and feel a powerful headache that rips through the front of my head. I cradle my head in my hands as I try to ignore the feeling of nausea in my stomach, fear gripping onto my throat as I start to weep again. I hear a knock at a door, but do not know where the sound comes from. Quietly I hear a female voice asking " M'Lady, are you alright?" though it is muffled, I know she is not in the room and hiding in the darkness, but still panic strikes me. I want to reply a harsh response, but she does not deserve my hatred, Hades does.

At the thought of him, I weep some more, trying to stifle my sobs and do not notice as the door knob turns. Dim light pours through the door as I try to control my emotions. I feel a hand on my back and tense immediately until I feel the stranger try to comfort me. I continue to break down and cry in front of her, not caring of my dignity as I cradle my head into her lap as she comforts me, like a mother would to comfort their child. I hear her whispering meaningless words as in "every thing will be fine" and "it's not the end of the world" but that makes me cry harder because nothing will be the same ever again, my innocence has been stolen. I feel her old warm palms lift my face to look into her eyes. She is an elderly woman, with warm eyes and a kind smile. She holds me close as I lean into her shoulder, instantly thankful that this stranger can be so kind.

She is able to calm me down with her smile and briefly leaves my side to light a candle in the room. I grow smaller at her departure, though I can still see her. She sits back on the bed with me and holds me at arms distance me, looking at the tear stained cheeks of mine. I advert her gaze, embarrassed that she knows how weak I am. Her voice matches her motherly nature as she says " Now deary, how are you feeling, physically?" she still tries to catch my eyes in the candle light but I drop my head down, I feel completely exhausted. She gently puts her hand beneath my chin to catch my eyes and shows me her warm smile, reassuring that I am safe. I sigh as I say with a broken voice, "exhausted, I feel absolutely exhausted… I have a splitting head ache and I feel as though I am going to be sick" I look her in the eyes, my tired eyes staring at her. She nods her head, knowing what is wrong with me and she lets go of my face and pats my knee, her sudden movement makes me tense and I see pity in her eyes. "You're in shock, M'Lady. I will tell the Lord that you are unfit to attend dinner to night." She gave me a warm smile, though she saw the flash of fear in my eyes as I knew who she was talking about. I nod absent mindedly, trying to make it sink in.

I am lost in my thoughts as she leaves my bed and asks me to rest for now until she comes back to take me to baths. She goes to blow out the light and I grab her wrist instantly snapping my self out of my dark mind. She looks startled and I feel fear in my veins once again, I say in a small voice " please leave the light on" and breath out a sigh of relief as she nods to my request. As she goes to the door and I stop her again with my timid voice "what's your name?" she turns around and smiles warmly answering "Agatha" and proceeds to leave me within my confines.

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As the elderly woman closes the bedroom door behind her, she walks briskly towards the dinning room where her master should be. She see's him sitting at his dinning table, deep in thought as she glances at the untouched food in front of him. She notices the extra plate for the new guest and sighs when she knows he will be heart broken when he hears the Lady's reply. He looks up at her with dark eyes, probably already knowing the answer, but he asks her all the same " Hecate will she be coming for dinner?" at the sound of her real name, the old lady's form began to disfigure and morph into a beautiful Goddess. Hecate, goddess of witchcraft shoulders began to slouch as she shakes her head. She watches as anger blazes through her masters eyes as he gets off of his seat and throws his plate at the wall watching it shatter into a million pieces. "What's her reason?" he growls, guilt eating away at his mind. With a cool composure, Hecate looks at him with her light blue eyes and answers, "she simply isn't well enough to dine with you this evening, Master" .She holds her ground as Hades glares daggers at her. She thinks to her self ' he may hate me now but he knows what he has done is wrong', as he starts to pace the room until he begins to attack the chairs, throwing them at the stone walls as he and yells out his anger.

Hecate simply stands there, not battering her eyelids out of fear, she has lived through enough of Hades temper tantrums to know he will soon calm down and brood in his personal quarters. But though her master and friend has committed this vile act she feels for him, never before has Hades acted on impulse and desire. Though the Gods and goddesses did as they pleased with out a sense of remorse, Hades was different. Sighing to herself, she hopes with his previous uncharacteristic act won't cause him much harm. She speaks above his growls as he continues to break everything in sight, "My Lord, I suggest you rest for the night, this must of taken it's toll on you, and you now cannot take the act back, only try to work from the damage". She listens his heavy breathing, knowing he was trying to control himself, knowing that she is right. With his back towards Hecate, Hades nods to her words, as he mumbles something that she can't hear. She bows towards her Lord and walks down the hall Persephone's in, hoping she hadn't heard his outrage and changing back into her disguise.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Once again i want to thank every one for their support, especially a guest called MrX, your first review was especially helpful :)

now enjoy

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Chapter 3:

I feel lifeless, that's all I can really feel right now. I don't know how long I have been in this room for, only leaving to use the bathroom. I guess I've been here for 3 days now, and the candle I stare at now is my only company. For the past three days I have been asked if I would accompany Hades for breakfast, lunch and dinner, and with each invite I decline. I focus on the hollow feeling where my heart once was, is this what one is meant to feel in the underworld? Perhaps I have truly died and this is my torment in the next life. I have no appetite, no energy and no hope. I don't even notice I'm crying until I feel my damp pillow as I move my head. Agatha has been kind to me, she seems to be always waiting for my orders, any little sound I make in my room I hear her knock on my door and question if I am alright. I'm waiting for the next invitation to dine with Hades, I will find out then what time of day it is. I don't know how long a goddess can go for with out eating or drinking, but I guess I'll soon find out.

But what a ridiculous request on Hades part to ask me to dine with him, did he not think his actions through, realize the consequences they will have on me? I shudder at the name Hades, he rarely leaves my thoughts as I go over what he has done, where his hands burned and torn out my soul. Perhaps he truly does have my soul, he already took something from me that was never meant to be taken. My mother, oh how I miss her, my mother always wanted me to remain pure, turning down any suitors that may have wished for my hand. How will my mother love me now, how will she look upon me when she realizes my fate? I should of fought more, when he tore my dress, when he threw me onto the bed, when he first dragged me onto his chariot. I should of runaway when I first heard the hooves of horses, the rumbling of the earth or the shaking of the ground beneath my feet. I should of never left my mother's safe haven or picked that beautiful, foreign flower. I cry a little louder at the thought of my regrets, how I could of saved my self from the fate I now face. My mother will be so disappointed in me for what I allowed myself to become.

My thoughts are interrupted as I see Agatha walk through my door, a forlorn look on her face, I know instantly my time is up, that Hades hasn't finished with me. Slowly I lean up to sit on my bed, eyeing her while I wait for her message from Hades, "Mi'Lady, Lord Hades, King of the Underworld, commands you to join him for dinner", she waits for my answer as a frown fills my brow. 'Commands' I think to myself, he has never 'Commanded' me to dinner. I look back up at her and ask, "what do you mean he commands me to dinner?" I see her grimace some more and I brace my self for her answer. I know he is the ruler of the underworld, but he is not my father, Zeus, who commands the gods and goddesses. "Lord Hades rules this realm, seeing how you are his guest, you are obliged to follow his orders, he has grown frustrated by your declines to eat with him." Agatha says, standing strong though her eyes show empathy. "Can't you tell him I aren't well, Agatha?" I silently pray that I wouldn't have to see his face again, rather stay in this empty room alone with my nightmares than look upon his face. "No miss, he has grown tired of that excuse, I am ordered to prepare you for dinner, Mi'lady" Agatha explains as I try to resist the bile that has risen in my throat. With a shaky voice I try to put on a brave face, one of a goddess and not of a fearful mortal as I stand weakly from my bed saying, "Very well then."

She leads me out of the room and into the baths, the only other place I have been during my stay, besides his bedroom. I stare at nothing as I sit in the bath full of smells that once made me smile as she washes my hair with scented oils. I shiver as I get out of the bath and allow her to dry me, groom me and make me presentable for the Lord of the Underworld. But all I could think of is my fears, would he try something at dinner? Would he expect me to bed him tonight? Would he take me again with out my consent? I can't help but bite my lips as I try to blink away unwanted tears. No he will not see me afraid, he will not have that power over me, I will walk in to the dinning hall with my head held high and behave like the Goddess my mother taught me to be. Before I am able to leave the bathroom I am shown my reflection. Holding a mirror before me Agatha speaks words of praise but I hardly hear them, all I see is a stranger. The image before me is of a woman, who wears a black gown that hugs tightly at her curves and generously shows her cleavage. The straps of the dress ties around her neck and add support to her bosoms as the dress catches in around her waist. The gown then flows down to the floor where it hides her bare feet. While her hair is perfected in the fashion of the goddesses, it is in a half bun that lets her curls roll down her back. Never had I looked like such a woman, such a goddess, but as I look at the reflections green eyes, I see they are broken and know that this reflection is definitely mine.

Agatha leads me towards the dinning hall, and not even my pep talk can quiet the screams in my head. I stop dead in my tracks as I try to control my breathing, never have I felt more helpless than I have in the last few days. I am meant to be immortal, a goddess, above all sickness and disease, but why do I feel so much pain, why can't I breath? I stumble my footing as I lean against the wall, my hands support me as I hear my strain for breathe, it seems I can not get enough oxygen, as if I'm being strangled. Agatha notices me immediately and grabs my shaking form, holding it close to hers as she moves away all of the hair on my face. I focus on her eyes as she catches my face and notice how she breaths, telling me to copy her breathing. It's hard at first and almost seems impossible. How can I be so weak? My lungs scream for oxygen but soon fill with air, soon I can breath again and lean against her form, exhaustion taking it's toll. She holds me close and whispers the same meaningless words to my ears as she wipes away my tears. I ask her with a hitched voice "what is wrong with me?", and hear her reply " a panic attack, my dear. That's all it was, a panic attack". I nod my head still not knowing what she means by panic attack and I fear that perhaps my godhood has been stolen, that I am just a mortal. I tell her my fears but her reply is a simple smile and "you are still the Goddess of Spring, Persephone. This is all in the mind. The feeling of nausea and headaches are from shock, while your struggle for breathe is a panic attack, this is all in your mind." she rocks me back and forth as a another concern hits me, "am I going crazy?" my voice sounds strange to my ears, as though all emotion has been ripped out of it. "No Mi'Lady, how you are reacting to the … trauma is very natural, but you will find your footing, Hades will help you with that". I push off her at the name of Hades and glare daggers at her, hating the helplessness I feel, the pain that God has brought me. She bows before me and says "Lord Hades will be waiting for you" and continues walking down the hall, where the man I loath waits for me.

I take in my surroundings as we walk along the cold marble floor. This is the first time I can actually inspect my surroundings and I take advantage of it, knowing that I am just procrastinating before I see Hades. The marble is white, though shadows roam without restraint due to the limited light.

Contrasting with the white walls, wrought iron is pressed against them. Looking like charcoal vines, it spreads across the walls designed in such a way images can be seen. The scenes of history that are shown all seem barbaric, but the beauty in the artwork fascinates me. No shame is shown for the naked beings that I can see the resemblance to. Zeus stands proud holding his lightening bolts while looking down onto the Titans. All are in sequence I notice as I try to examine the art works while I walk towards the dinning room, using my hand to feel the cold rough metal beneath my fingers. Pillars divide the wrought iron scenes as they are in alignment with the wall. They seem to be more for decoration than to help keep the structure, deterioration of time leave it looking cracked and chipped.

I go to examine the next scene on the wall but I see it is of Hades. I can't help my body's reaction, fear begins to spread as I am reminded of his deeds. My eyes linger on the image of him for too long as I inspect it, it's of Hades on his chariot. Closing my eyes I remember seeing it come out from the ground, the smell of nature disrupted by the smell of death. I look at the details of the man upon it, angular jaw with high cheek bones, strong muscles hidden beneath the armor and lifeless eyes. I don't seem to recognize the features of the statue, although I know it to be Hades.

I've replayed the event time and time again in my head, from first seeing the flower to when I fell asleep on his floor. But I only remember seeing his face when he held his bare palm to mine, as I begged him to stop. I still don't know what that look was in his eyes, perhaps desire, the intensity scarred me and still does. I don't want to experience it again, from another or from within. Agatha's voice pulls me out of my thoughts as I see her standing at the end of the hall before large double doors. I guess they are made out of some sort of dark oak as I walk towards her, steadying my breathing and reminding my self to be brave. He has nothing more to take from me, I came to the decision during my first night here. My mother wouldn't want me back after she finds out what has become of me, and I don't want her to find out, it would tear out her heart to know of his deed. Agatha opens the door before me and bows to me while I nod my head at her. She see's the flash of fear in my eyes and gives me a warm smile as she turns to enter into the dinning hall.

I take in the large room before me, dark marble walls with silk black banners flowing against them. Fire in large bowls stand at the corners of the room as well beside the entrances of the hall. My eyes fall to the man sitting at the table, seeming to be lost in deep thought. He seems to be biting his nails as he looks towards the ground, his face emotionless. I take a deep breath and take a step forward, my bare feet not making a sound, though he now turns his head and faces me. Even though his face is still emotionless his eyes betray an emotion before they too are masked.

He stands up now, still looking at me. I remember my manners as I formally curtsy before him and with a new strength I say, "Thank you for your invitation to dine with you this evening, Lord of the Underworld", as I stand before him his face is still emotionless, still stone cold like his statues. He takes a step forward to guide me to my seat but I flinch at his move, my new found strength and left over dignity are gone with in a moments notice. He see's my fear and decides to comply with it, not moving any further towards me, but with gracefully strong hands he shows me where to sit. I bite my lip as I go towards the seat next to his, hating the closeness he wants as he stands behind me and pushes me into my seat.

He knows I'm on full alert, if my previous actions didn't reveal it, my increased heart rate would surely give it away. He sits beside me and doesn't look at me, trying to think of what needs to be done. I can't read his face so I don't know what to expect from him, but nothing on his face gives away any cruel intentions. He clears his throat and I can't help but flinch, and I feel his gaze on my face, I look up as if I had not flinched but I can't meet his eyes, so I look at his hands instead. "I'm glad you could join me this evening Persephone, there are some things that I need to discuss with you" he says. This is the first time I've heard him speak, and although I didn't expect him to sound like a monster, I didn't expect him to sound like a gentlemen either. All that I can reply with is my manners, if I didn't stick with them I don't know if I would start to break down and cry or yell and scream in fury. "I am glad you welcome my presence, the last few nights I have been feeling ill" I say but neither of us believe my words. I don't stare at his eyes but I feel as though I have confused him by his silence. "Very well then, Seph… can I call you Seph?", he stops to ask me a question, getting himself comfortable at the table, leaning against the back of his chair watching me. I bite my cheek at this, I don't want him to give me a nickname, we aren't friends, I want the formalities. But I nod none the less in fear of his anger. "Good, well Sephie, as you probably know well by now this is the underworld," he gestures the around him, " and it's completely different than the fields you once lived at with Demeter, but you'll soon adjust, it is advised that you don't leave the castle with out supervision and you don't try to leave the kingdom, though there is no way out and it will just make me angry". My eyes widen at what I hear him say, I try fighting back the panic at being expected to stay here long enough to adjust, and I try to cover my fear, "I thought I would be going back to my mother, seeing how she will be missing me so and needs help with the harvest. As well as … " I can't finish the sentence with out tears welling up in my eyes. "As well as what, Seph?" he questions, amusement sounding in his voice. With the last bit of strength of my composure I reply, "you've already stolen something that was never meant to be yours, what value is there of keeping me here?"

He thinks for a second, most likely to irritate me, he knows what I am referring too and replies, "When I see something I like, I generally take it… and it wasn't stolen, it was given to me". I look up, my confusion can't be hidden. He see's that I've been silently crying and as he gets up I tense when he takes a few steps towards me. Standing behind me, he places his hands on my shoulder and I try so hard not to pull away. Unconsciously I have grabbed a knife and he glances down as he watches my knuckles turn white as I clutch onto it for dear life. Leaning down beside me, his large hand takes hold of my smaller one, and with such gentleness his hand takes away the one thing that made me feel safe in this room. He leans into my ear and whispers, "You were mine when you were born, Zeus gave you to me", I gasp at the thought, and in the corner of my eye I see him watching my reaction. Betrayal and hurt crosses my features, but fear over powers them all as I feel his hands on my cheeks gently wiping away my tears, while he says, "so my dear, now that you know that you belong to me, you aren't going home to see you beloved mother. You are to stay down here and be my queen, rule beside me, be my wife " a sob escapes my lips and my hands cradle my face, not wanting him to see me this weak. He must of nodded to Agatha because I feel her warm hands on my back trying to soothe me and notice he leaves the room, with a slam of the door.

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A/N: I don't know if this has too much detail for your liking, with the hall and how she is dressed. It will be a few days before the next chapter is up and as always constructive criticism is welcomed :)


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Sorry about the delay in updates, I had originally planned to post chapter 4 on Tuesday, but i didn't feel too confident with this chapter and i still don't. But the bulk of chapter 5 and 6 are already done so they should be up within the next few days.

as always, constructive criticism is always welcomed and enjoy :)

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Chapter 4:

Fields of gold sway lightly in the breeze as the Goddess of the harvest stands up right to stretch her back. Looking up to the sun, she shields her eyes as she embraces the warmness of it's power, thanking Apollo for such a fine day. But in the distance storm clouds grow to threaten the day, though it would be good for her harvest. With graceful hands she begins her work again, though a smile does not appear on her face. Deep in thought, Demeter tries to analyze her feelings of uneasiness, that had settled over her heart as she watched the sun rise that morning. She had seen the side glances from the nymphs as they worked with her in the fields, wondering what was wrong with her. Usually her fields were full of laughter and song, but none had dared to breech the quietness that Demeter seemed to ask for.

"My Lady, is everything alright?" one of the closes nymphs asks her, only stopping her work when Demeter turns to face her.

"I don't know…" is all she can reply with. Nothing in the environment was out of place, the sounds of nature stirred around them, reminding them that life had not been interrupted.

Nervously the same nymph says, "My Lady, I don't want to be out of place, but you seem very distracted today". Fiddling with the hem of her dress, the nymph dares not to look at her Goddess in the eyes, in fear of offending her. Out of all the Olympian Goddesses, Demeter was the most relaxed one, with exception of her daughter, one still could not be too careful around them.

Sighing mostly to her self, Demeter smiles at the nymph, agreeing with what she had said, "yes it does seem my attention is else where today", looking around for her woven basket, she bends down to pick it up and place it on her hip saying, "perhaps a splash of water can help me refocus". Moving through the fields, she looks down at the woven basket to examine her pickings for the harvest. Smiling to her self they seem perfect, feeling pride for the fine work Persephone had done with the young saplings. But her smile falters as she hears the sound of hooves in the distance, looking up she see's three white horses galloping down the main road, towards her temple. Though the riders wear dark robes, she knows immediately who they are. Her insides scream that they are the ones looking after Persephone, that a misdeed has happened to her baby. Dropping her woven basket, Demeter runs to the main road stopping in front of the horses. The riders upon each horse hesitantly remove the clocks from their faces to reveal their identity. Each sharing a grim look on their faces, Demeter asks the question she fears most, "What has become of my daughter?".

* * *

Looking out the window of my new chambers my heart constricts in pain, the memory of the golden fields in the world above contrasts greatly to the grayness seen in the underworld. With a heavy sigh I leave the cold window as I prepare myself for the day.

I hear the murmur of voices as I walk around the castle, servants and maids surprised by my appearance as I wander these halls. I hear the words "lifeless", "broken" and "dead" and I can't agree with them more. I haven't seen Hades since the night he commanded me to dine with him, and even though he still commands it I decline, not caring about my fate anymore. I am to be his wife and never have I felt so much pain at such a simple notion. This whole experience has changed me physically and mentally. Once before I had only felt the emotions of contentment, happiness, security and love and now, I don't even know if words can describe my emotions. They're new to me and powerful, exhausting me and taking control. If I think too much on the recent events I become victim to another panic attack. I never knew gods and goddesses could be so weak. But the mind is a fragile thing apparently, that's what Agatha keeps telling me. Even though she has been the closes thing to support for me down in this realm of torture, I still can't shake the suspicions in my mind about her. I am grateful for her help, but what servant would touch a goddess with out a command, or speak so openly in their presence.

I shake my head at the thought, no I will not alienate my self from my only friend in this place. I am grateful for her bold spirit, for with out it I wouldn't be able to call her my friend.

Today is the first day she hasn't walked with me through the castle, we had developed this routine for the last three days where she would show me different areas to help me get my mind off of things. Today she can not accompany me and the only reason why I have left my room is because I was told that my future husband is off on business. I can't believe that I am to be married to that cold bastard, it seems he takes pleasure out of seeing me so hurt.

I don't even have a destination in mind but some how I find myself out near the gardens. The yard stretches far and facing opposite the castle is a wild forest. I sit down on the grass looking at the forest, as if it is calling to me. I remember what Agatha had told me about it, it's special and draws people and animals towards it, it's apart of its dangerous nature though. When I had asked why is it so dangerous she had told me that I would find out when the time was right. I look away from the forest and begin to look at the manicured garden, the grass is a beautiful dark green while it contrasts with the stone pathway. I look around and take in the assumption that this garden was well planned. Getting up I go look at the flowers I have never seen before, touching them, smelling each individual but then I see it. I see the one flower that condemned me here. I hesitate to pick up the white flower that has haunted my dreams and bend down to pick it. Bring it up to my face to smell it, I ask the small flower, "why did you cause me harm?" and freeze when I hear a reply

"It's just a flower"

I turn around suddenly, my heart racing as I see Hades a few steps behind me, looking at the flower then to me. I bow before him and mumble out a terrible excuse to leave his presence and go to run, but I am stopped at the sound of his voice. "Please stay", I turn around again and face him, always waiting for him to attack me. I see his apprehension when he asks, "walk with me?" and he signals his arm for me to hold. But I walk past him, not wanting to touch him. He catches up to my step and for a few paces it's quiet and unnerving. "I'm surprised by your presence, I thought your days were generally busy with condemning the dead" I say, the bitterness could hardly be hidden in my voice. Quickly checking me over he responds," generally they are but I was surprised you called for me" he says not looking at me. Confusion washes over me as I don't understand how I called him. I twirl the flower still in my hands and realization hits me, "you mean, your connected to this flower?" I ask and all I receive is a nod from Hades. I stop dead in my tracks as I try to control the scream that wants to rip through my throat. All this pain was caused because I picked a simple flower? Hades doesn't stop for me, but continues on the stone path to sit at a bench. He signals for me to join him and I comply although I sit as far from him as possible. "I'm sorry for calling you out of your duties, there must be a hold up now that you are gone, " I say but he doesn't answer, he is to busy observing me.

"Though I am sworn to my duties, I think it would be healthy for us to get to know each other better", he says looking at me. I don't have the nerve to look at him, so I look out over the garden and comment, "you have a beautiful garden, my lord" it's the only compliment I can pay him. Though I could pay him a compliment on the beautiful rooms he has given me, and for his kingdom in general, basically anything in this kingdom but not him. "Thank you," he says quietly and continues, "it's always been a favorite of mine, but seeing how you are to be my wife, you can also enjoy it when you want". I bite my lip at the reminder of the impending day and ask, "when is the wedding planned for, my lord", trying to hide my fear. "Within a couple of days" he says nonchalantly. I can't help but gasp at the closeness, I turn to face him and his face holds no emotion, so I ask, "Don't you think it's too soon, I mean we hardly no each other" my eyes are wide, and there is a pleading tone in my voice. He looks at my face and smiles when he see's the discomfort he has put me in. "We already know each other more than necessary for a couple to be married", he waits for my reaction and I turn my head away. I try to focus my breathing until I hear, "We've already made love, I've seen you vulnerable and know you more than your mother ever will"

With his last comment I feel something snap, never had I felt so much anger towards another.

I stand up abruptly and go to walk away before I say something I know I will regret, but I hear him leave the bench and feel his hand on my wrist and I allow myself to be spun around. Though against what he expects my palm connects with his face. With a voice I do not recognize as my own, I growl, "You do not know me, nor will you ever know me! It is true that you have seen me vulnerable, the most vulnerable and scared I have ever been, but that was because you raped me!" I stop as I feel a sob block my throat, at the thought of what he has put me through but I continue saying," We did not make love, and if that is what one is meant to feel when you make love, I would be happy never to do it again, with any one! How dare you talk to me as if you know me, as if you have nothing to apologize for. I could never make love with a monster like you!" I wipe my hands over the tears that had started to cry and look away from him for a moment. We both listen to my heavy breathing as I struggle against my tears before I ask, "Does it give you pleasure to make me cry?".

With my head still turned away I hear him say,"This was never my intentions, I never wanted to hurt you,"

I frown at his response, I can't comprehend what other intentions he could have had when he tore my life apart.

In a whisper all I can say is "yet here we are now." and turn to leave him, alone in his garden as I cry and wish for a savior.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I hope every one is enjoying the story, if there are ways i can improve it just let me know, as i said earlier in my first A/N, this is my first fan fiction :S

Any way i hope you enjoy this chapter, i'm in two minds about it.

As always constructive criticism is welcomed and enjoy :)

* * *

The candle once my only companion, now an enemy. I watch how the wax drips from the flame, then trails down the side of the candle to reach the base. With each drip it shows me how long I have left of my old life. When the flame dies and the candle is out, it will be time for me to make my way to the thrown room and become Hades' queen.

I look down at the white gown I wear but I don't smile. Wearing white seems to be a cruel joke at me, white has always meant purity, but mine was ripped away from me. The gown itself is gorgeous, and I feel unworthy of such fine silks and laces. I can't tear my eyes off of my reflection, the goddess before me is beautiful, but broken, perfect for the title 'Queen of the Dead'.

The last few days have been a blur, I have stayed in my room while I watched from the window the preparations for this day. The court yard looks magical, flowers I do not know were ordered in and planted, while lampposts light the path for the visitors. From watching out the window at the preparations I knew that the vows were to be taken at the time of twilight, before the night completely engulfs this realm. Looking out the window, I see my assumption is right, it's almost twilight now and soon my life in the darkness will begin.

I see Agatha standing in the corner, watching over the preparations made but I can't see her smile, only frown. She catches my eyes on her and she walks over towards me, a small smile on her lips, "Is there anything you need? Or want?". I think it over, I haven't ate within 2 weeks now, nor have a drunk water but the only thing I can think of is my mother. Looking at Agatha through the mirror I simply say, " I wish my mum was here…". I can't hold her gaze as guilt washes over her eyes and with a sad smile she places her hand on my shoulder and gives a squeeze, an attempt at comfort. Signaling to the maids, the maids move away from me, she gently places my hand on her arm as she says "It's time now deary".

Instantly I look towards the candle as I watch the flame begin to die, thinking 'is this what mortals feel when they are at their last breath, the need for more time?'

Gently Agatha squeezes my hand again as she leads me out of my chambers and towards my new life.

Every thing seems to become slow motion as we walk out the doors. I see Hades servants every where and even though I know time hasn't slowed I can't shake my self out of the daze. She walks me down the grand stair case and I watch the servants fixing flowers, I see the maids holding my trail and I seem to lose my breath. I keep strong though, lifting my head I face the double doors that lead to the thrown room, knowing what lies behind there and who is waiting for me. slowly the doors open and I see faces in the darkness I don't know. Light is limited here as I look down at the long aisle, candles on either side lighting the way for my step.

Hidden beneath my veil I see people begin to stand but what catches my eyes is Hades standing at the end of the blood red aisle. He stands proud, though he seems unattached, like this isn't even his wedding. Behind him three women stand, all short in comparison to their lord and I recognize them as the fates. I feel my knees get weak and I fear another panic attack is taking control of me, but my mind doesn't seem to register it. My mind doesn't seem to register anything but the voices that have settled into my mind since the first day I woke here. They scream that I have no future now, that I will be in a loveless marriage, that no one is here to save me. They laugh at me and my weakness while they tell me this is what I deserve, that this is my eternal torment.

I stop dead in my tracks as I think about everything that has been taken from me and what will be taken once I'm caged by this monster. I look down to the bouquet in my hands and notice how they have began to wilt and die and I see this as a sign of my self.

I start to shake my head and start walking back. Quickly turning around I hear the murmurs of the crowd but don't dare to stop now. I push past the maids, my veil flies off as I race out of the double doors. Before I leave the thrown room I see the anger in Hades eyes and it makes me run faster. I know I have deeply disrespected Hades now, embarrassing him in front his guests. He will want to take his revenge upon me and even though I have no where to hide I keep running.

I reach the closes exit of the castle and it leads me to the luscious court yard. I see in the distance the edge of a forest and as I continue to run I feel my heels sink in to the moist ground. Barely stopping I pull off my shoes but I am grabbed from behind and lifted into the air. I recognize his scent immediately and wish to cower and beg for forgiveness. I open my eyes and see the forest before I look into Hades' angered ones. As I look into his eyes, I see flashes of different emotions, but the one that scares me the most is not his anger but the look of desire.

I struggle again against him and all I can feel is fear that he will hurt me like last time. Images of being thrown on to his bed flash before my eyes, of him tearing my gown. I scream for help like last time but remember no one will save me. I feel his hands every where and I can't decipher if it's my memory or if its now. Some where in my mind I know he won't attempt his vile act upon me out side, but it doesn't quiet the screams in my mind.

I keep struggling and feel the panic attack reach my throat. With my last ounce of breath I push off of him as far as I could and right hook him right into his nose. He drops me to the ground as he cradles his bloody nose and I scramble away from him. I don't look back as he yells at me, ordering me to stop but I don't hear much else as I reach into the forest and don't look back until I feel safe.


	6. Chapter 6

**Forest of the Lost part 1**

* * *

I never reached that feeling of feeling safe...

The air is damp, and a cold chill runs with the breeze. This doesn't look like the forests on my mothers' lands nor does it feel like it. I cannot feel a connection to nature here, it feels as though it is dead, that there has never been a life force present here. In the world above I can't get lost in foreign forests because it talks to me, it guides me to where I want or need to be. Here though I feel as though I have been stripped of even my own natural senses that even mortals have.

My legs are covered in mud while my once white gown has tears and rips, but still I walk. My breathing is strained, I feel so tired and there is no light here in these woods only darkness. All I can assume is that I've been walking for a long time. I feel my feet sink down into the mud and every step is a struggle, I pull my knees high as I keep walking, knowing I am not safe here. Although I have my natural goddess light I can't compete with the natural dark mist here. But I can feel something is watching me, even if I can't see them nor hear them.

My foot lands on something sharp and I crash down over it, causing a cut to my leg. I brighten my light a little more, and look at the odd branch that caused my fall. It seems as if nature has also turned its back on me. My arms are covered in mud, up to my elbows, as they attempted to break my fall and I push myself up off the ground, knowing I cannot stay here. I just pray that I find refuge soon.

I hear the cry of a crow and look up immediately, seeing only its figure. I hold a hand over my rapidly beating heart as I try to calm my breathing, the crow startled me for it is the only living thing I have seen in this forest. Its cry is deafening and I hold my hands over my ears to try and block out its call. I see the crow watching me, cocking its head to the side and repeat its cry, almost as if it is insulting me. I keep watch of it scrunching my eyes at the beast, it is bigger than the normal sized crow, perhaps two or three sizes bigger, with three heads instead of one and I know it is a creature in only the realm of Hades.

I hear movement up a head and turn to see a deer with its own natural glow. I breathe a sigh of relief hoping that it could help, like the creatures in the world above do. Slowly I walk towards it, watching it as it sniffs the air, but it hears my movement, and looks at me, before running off. I go for the chase, never before has an animal felt threatened by me, and I hope that it is leading me to help. I try to keep up with it, but the spirit animal loses me in the darkness. I stop as I try to catch my breath, bending over as I feel tiredness try to take control. But I suddenly stand up straight as I hear movement from behind. I don't want to turn around, I don't know if I want to see what is behind me, but I can't help turning to the sound of it again. I don't see anything though, only darkness. It can't be the deer from earlier, there is no glow, or light that the creature provided. I hear movement again but beside me, and I know that it is not one creature but several. I hear movement all around me, I try to listen to hear where it's coming from. I keep turning around to see if I can see anything but all I see is darkness.

Lightly I feel something gaze the back of my head and I scream and crouch to the ground. With my hands protectively over my head and my knees to my chest I resemble a frightened child. My eyes are closed shut and I can only hear the sound of my breathing. But with the silence a horrid smell assaults my nostrils. It smells of death, of decomposing flesh. Slowly I bring myself up to a stand, and with all the courage I can muster I reach my hand forward and concentrate of my light. With my eyes focused on my outstretched hand, the light grows little by little, but my concentration is broken when I see something swinging beside me. I turn around instantly, and look up at the tree as a hand reaches down for me. I stumble back against another tree and feel hands grip onto my shoulders, I scream and try to pull myself away from the souls of suicide, destined to hang on the noose they had killed themselves on. I try to run past but all I feel hands pulling at me. In most of the trees body's hang, the smell of rot and flesh sting my eyes. I get hauled back as a creature grabs my hair and stops me from escape. I fall back onto the ground and feel the roots of the surrounding trees lift from the ground and try to trap me. I cry out in pain as the strong roots crush a wrist of mine, but with a split second decision I form a fire ball and throw it at the root. I am free from it and I continue to run as the root still connected to my wrist withers away and dies instantly. With adrenaline fueling me, I run out past the trees where corpses hang with tears in my eyes.

* * *

Looking over a map, Hades intently scans the areas that still need to be checked, his betrothed lost in the Forest of the Lost. "My Lord, you need to rest you haven't slept since she first disappeared" Hecate says behind him, analyzing him closely.

"And I bet she hasn't rested yet either Hecate" Hades growls his eyes never leaving the map. "Have you found any traces yet? Felt her presence? Have the men found any clues?", finally he turns around as he asks the questions but regrets it as he see the disappointed look on Hecate's' face. Punching his fist down at the table Hades snarls his regrets, hating the situation they are in. Hesitantly Hecate comes towards him, placing a careful hand onto his shoulder, she looks at the worried king before her.

'If only Persephone could see this side of him', she thinks to herself but dares not to say it out loud. But her thoughts are interrupted when she hears a whisper, full of pain and remorse, "It's all my fault… everything is my fault. She deserved someone better than me…"

* * *

Never have I felt threatened by nature and never have I thought that I would have to harm nature. It's against everything I was taught and everything I am. Here nature rejects life and I am life, I am forced though to adapt, to change to the will of death. Perhaps this was an underlying fear of mine hidden in my unconscious, the fear of nature, rejection of it. What am I if not devoted to nature? Will this place show me the true fears I hold in my heart? And will it make me act like a savage, thinking of only of survival and the fight. Not caring if I harm nature around me and in doing so, myself...

Eventually I am forced to slow my pace, but I am still lost in the forest, everything looking the same. Once I use to giggle when mortals became lost in forests before I would guide them out, but now I know the fear. Looking down at my dress, I grab some tattered silk but I halt my actions. If I was to tear a strip of my gown I could use it as a check point, to see if I have truly been running in circles. But then I risk Hades finding my trail. Would that be such a bad thing in a situation like this? I scoff at myself at that thought, of course it would be, I would have to be thankful for him saving me, and risk the repercussions of his anger over the wedding. Closing my eyes trying to think, I feel guilt slightly wash over me, I completely embarrassed him in front of his subjects. But as soon as I recognize the feeling of guilt I squash any thought of compassion, no he deserved that and more. But still I hold the tattered material in my hands, questioning myself. Am I deluding myself in this situation, is there any possibility I can get out of the forest by myself? Or do I truly need his help? What does it mean if I let him help? No I am not _letting_ him, I _need_ his help. What if I do get out the forest but end up further away from the palace, closer to the center of Tarturas? Sighing in defeat I tear a little of my gown and tie it to a branch, telling myself that I accept the consequences of this action. But I continue walking, soon I will know if I am walking in circles or if not, soon I will know.

* * *

I had closed my eyes for a second before, but I heard the black crow's cry up above me. Now I am running away trying to lose the crow, in case it is following me. I keep running until I see it, a flash of white and brown. I stop in my tracks and walk towards the shred of material I had used as a check point. I feel my throat clutch shut as tears try to escape my eyes. Falling to the ground, I cradle my face in my hands as I feel my emotions rip through me. There is so much pain that I cannot keep up with the thoughts in my head and as I cry out I feel my breathing quicken. Steadying myself I lay myself on the ground my fingers digging through the moist ground as I try to control my breathing . But Agatha isn't here to help this time, to show me how to breath. Fear spreads through me now, what happens if I can't get through this? The sounds of myself chocking is the only sound I can hear, as I continually try to blink back the tears, I tell myself I will get through it, just let it pass and soon it does, but it takes my energy with it. Sitting back up on my knees, I'm tempted to rest here, but a new sound comes from the darkness and I rapidly turn my head to see my next challenge.

I see a small child, huddled together, whimpering, crying to herself. Getting up I hesitantly walk towards her, noticing the child has its own ethereal glow. Thinking it is a spirit I ask, "Spirit Child, what is wrong?" the child continues to ignore me, holding herself closer, afraid of the dark, like myself. Gently placing a hand on her shoulder, I feel her cold skin beneath my fingers. "Child, what has happened?" the child turns around and I lose my breath. Staring back at me are my own eyes, she looks like me when I was a child. Taking a step back from her as though she has burnt me, I look at her with suspicious eyes, while she stands from her crouching position.

"You!" she growls, I don't recognize her voice, but the look in her eyes is pure hatred. "You killed me!" she yells out, my hands cover my ears as her voice seems to shake me, I never killed her, how could I if she is me?

"I didn't kill you!" I yell back against the accusation. She shakes her head firmly, not believing me, "You killed me as soon as you allowed what Hades did to you!" she grits out. I stand before the small child in utter shock not wanting to believe her. "I didn't allow him to do that to me", I say crying. My knees buckle underneath me and I fall to the ground, staring at her. She stands taller than me now, her eyes full of sadness and hurt instead of hatred. "No you didn't allow him? You should have fought more, you might have well just went to him yourself as a virgin sacrifice. Your weakness killed me, your innocence" she stares down at me as she speaks with broken words, and I nod my head in understanding, thinking, 'this is my entire fault'.

"Because of you, I will never be loved by Mama again! She has left us here for your actions' consequences. You should have never left the field! You should have fought more! You are weak Persephone! Never again will you be called 'Kore', never again will mother love us, because of you! She hates us and once she see's you and what you have become she will never forgive you, only look at you in disgust, we were meant to be pure. Oh how you have disgraced yourself and hurt Mama! You're a monster and deserve this eternal punishment!" she yelled getting angrier and angrier. She takes off into the forest, but I chase after her, needing her back beside me to make things right. I keep running but she is faster, swiftly moving between trees without hesitation, it seems she knows these lands.

But in the corner I my eye I see something chasing us. It runs beside me but I can only see a tall figure, it's faster than me or my innocence but I notice it's not after me but her. I continue to run, to catch her before this monster does and I see light up a head. The mud turns to grass and the trees come to life, blinking the scenery around me completely changes. I stop immediately, noticing where I am, I am not in the dark forest any more but in a field of life, a field of my mothers.

Smiling to myself I stretch my arms to take in the warmth, feeling relief that the nightmare is over, but I hear something that makes my eyes snap back open. I see my former self, my innocence in the field, playing with the butterflies as her long curls move in the breeze, she seems completely oblivious to me now, as though she never saw me earlier. Walking towards her hesitantly a feeling of dread sweeps through me, I know what is to happen and I need to warn her. If I save her now, I could save myself from my heart ache. I walk up the slight hill in the meadow but then the creature that followed us flies out of the darkness. Wings like a ravens' feather fly past me and I feel the power of them by the air they disrupt. I scream out "Kore! Watch out" but it's too late, the dark figure catches the girl by the hair and lifts her up into the air.

I scream as I run up the rest of the way, until I hear a thundering crack. I watch from below as the creature drops her from the air. I watch as the girl falls, but she doesn't scream in fear of falling. Her body hits the ground hard but not a sound escapes her lips only mine. Her unfocused eyes look in my direction and that's when I know that she is dead. The loud crack was her neck snapping by the beast hands.

Suddenly the beast swoops down above the girl, not noticing me. It stands as tall as a man, with dark hair and pale skin. The skin is so pale I see its blue veins beneath its skin, looking almost leathery like a reptile. It bends over the girl, taking her hand in its claws and bringing her hand to its mouth. It opens its jaw and bites down onto her flesh.

I shriek as I see blood drop from her hand on the beasts' needle like teeth. It takes notice of me now, standing tall from its prey, smiling at me and that's when I notice who it is, Hades. I stare at the monster he is, though he looks more demonic now. With wings large and powerful, his naked figure seems disfigured and broken. As pale as he is, his figure shows his powerful muscles. I don't remember him with an almost blue grey complexion that is riddled with dark blue and purple veins. And his hands, powerful and dirty, covered in blood, my blood, with long nails blackened by mud. Little spikes form out of his forearm, as though it is armor, while the same are attached to the back of his calves. His once blue eyes have a crazed red through them, which turn to black while he watches me. Even his feet resemble claws.

I am snapped out of my fear by a whisper, I look down towards my innocence and see her whisper, "Run Persephone" and I do, I run back into the forest as I hear the wind of the beasts wings push it off the ground, I run back into the darkness hoping to lose him again.

* * *

As I ran I noticed that the forest wasn't as lifeless as I once thought. Looking through the darkness I notice different creatures lingered here. But even though I knew that the beast that looked like Hades isn't chasing me anymore, my legs won't let me stop because I didn't want the same fate as the smaller me suffered. I didn't help her, I didn't save her, I didn't give her any warning, and I caused her death and let her die. I stop running with that thought in my mind… it was all my fault, I am the cause for my own pain.

The feeling of grief and remorse wash over me like powerful waves… I don't believe I can save myself, I just watched my innocence die again and I was helpless to it. Allowing myself to sit on the ground I stare out absent mindedly, not truly looking at anything, I am too lost in my thoughts to notice anything. I don't notice that I am crying again until I feel a cold breeze against my face and it touches where my tears fall. I begin to cradle myself as the dark thoughts tempt to swallow me whole, that what the little me said is true, I am a monster and this is my entire fault. Tears trickle down my dirt stained face as I scream out in pain, anger and frustration. There is no escape in leaving this torment.

"Get up…" I hear, hesitantly I turn to where the voice came from and I see a figure of golden light. Squinting my eyes to adjust them to the brightness, I make out the figure to be a woman, still materializing before me. I stand up as I see her eyes and I know instantly who they belong to… my mother. "Look at you, covered in mud, you look like an animal" Demeter says in disgust. I keep my head down as I listen to her words, they too are full of hate and barely I whisper, "I missed you Mama". Closing my eyes, I hear her yell, "Don't you dare call me Mama! You are not my daughter, you are not my Kore, you are Hades' whore" I feel the tears drip from my face as a sob escapes my lips, thinking the word over, 'Hades' whore'.

"But mama, I didn't mean to, I swear, I tried to fight him, but he was too strong, you have to believe me Mama!" I beg but am instantly silenced. I feel the sting across my check, as my face looks down to the side. My mama slapped me. "You are not Kore, you are not innocent or pure, you are a harlot, a monster. This is what you become after I raised you so well. You are disgusting and weak, you are pathetic … filth" she said, demanding me to believe her. And I do, I believe every word she says.

"But mama, I love you, I want to go home, please you have to believe me that I tried to fight him, I tried but… but", flashes of that night fight through my mind, and I cry out putting my hand on my mouth to try and control the pain. " but what _Persephone_" she said my name as though it was venom, I look back up at her, waiting for her, hoping she could save me, see that I still love her, that I didn't mean anything. "Mama, I'm sorry, I should never have left the field. Don't you love me?" I beg, my voice so small and broken it reveals my vulnerability. "How could I love a whore of the Underworld… Did you enjoy it, the way he fucked you? Did he take you from behind? Did you enjoy feeling of being over powered? The tear of flesh, of your innocence? Did you call out his names for the high heavens to hear? Did he spill his seeds into your womb? Or did you swallow?

Did you sleep next to him when it the deed was over, listen to his promises to you to become his Queen of the Underworld? Did you believe his lies?" My Mama screamed at me as she circled me. My head began to get dizzy, her voice overwhelming me with her accusations, all I could see in my mind was Hades, all I could feel was the fear of what he was doing to me, where his hands went.

"STOP IT! STOP IT! Please… stop… Mama" I scream as I fall to the ground once more, fighting not nto throw up.

My mama looks down at my fallen form, I barely hold myself up, one hand supporting my frail body as my other hand covers my mouth.

She bends down towards my ear and whispers, "you are not loved, not by any one on Olympus, by me or even Hades. He will leave you lost here, while he looks for a new conquest, he has what he wanted from you, and now you are nothing more than just a lost, broken girl" she pauses as she looks at me, my sobs interrupting her calm voice. "you brought this upon yourself, now no one will ever love you again, because all you are is the lost whore of Hades," she stands as she finishes her sentences, I go to look up at her, watching her disappointed look on her face as she says, "you are no daughter of mine" and leaves me alone on the forest floor crying, broken and wishing for death.

* * *

A/N: hey sorry for the delay, I've had a bit of writers block. um hopefully the next few chapters will be up, and i hope you enjoyed this chapter.

constructive criticism is always welcomed :)


	7. for the readers

Dear readers,

this story has not been forgotten, i am currently rewriting all of the chapters, adding more to it as well as writing up the next chapters. I am debating which way the story will go, naturally the only way that the couple could have a happy ending after everything Persephone has been through would be Stockholm Syndrome, but i want her to be of sound mind, as well as Demeter would never allow that in my thoughts. i imagine this will have a few more chapters, or many more but please bare with me and when they are up dated enjoy.

love

evening blue


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